Have I left you yet? Then the other words return as a whisper, just wait expectantly.
The problems are so weighty. Ones we never thought we would experience. I want the parting of the sea. The waters to turbulently gush to my side left and right, fish flopping on dry ground as I pass to a land of promise. I want to see miracles that obliterate pain, unfairness, unexpected poverty. If I’m unable to have control over some of the circumstances that I want to change the most, then I want the God, the Author of life to speak into the problems and perform what my eyes and ears yearn for.
I yearn for miracles.
When I read through the Miracles book that was gifted to me by a friend, I was astounded by the sheer miracle of life. The teleological argument as it is known as has always astounded me concerning the deeper complexities of life. I once only saw chaos in my younger years, ungratefully forsaking the aesthetics- my favorite oak tree, the symmetry of a baby’s face, or the orientation of the universe that if such minute details were off the tiniest fraction, would easily cause the destruction of the universe.
I believed so many years ago of an Author of my life, yet the problems still mount. We were just talking yesterday about the confusion that has assaulted us at times. Michael and I thought that if nothing else, I would have been out of the wheelchair and walking with ease a year ago. I thought Michael would have been able to have steady job by now- easily. I thought that our previous financial security would return- that planning a future would resume, a baby would be in my womb, and that the taste of this one hefty season of trials would be terminated.
The book on Miracles from Eric Metaxas jarred me. Reading two of the stories elicited unbidden tears with Michael asking what was wrong. I wanted what they had. I wanted the taste of freedom from my health issues. I wanted God to raise His hand and declare this season was finished. But what is a season truly? How long do these seasons of trials last?
I am reduced to humbleness when I read of the stories of men unfairly locked up in a prison without a definitive date of release. The broken marriages that seem to loom without a hint of a breakthrough. A broken body that has no time stamp of healing.
The whisper still remains when problems loom. Have I left you yet?
Every day we name three things we are grateful for that day. Is this list not a miracle? Is it not a miracle to have love graciously poured into our lives by so many? Is it not a miracle to have the promise of heaven?
Are there any miracles that you desire in your life? You don’t have to respond, I think we all do. There are so many times where I wish I could sit down to coffee or tea with anyone reading these posts. Sometimes my encouragements seem frail, but I wish that if nothing less, I could hear your own story. With all hope, maybe one day I can.
